How to Fight Fairly

How to Fight Fairly

I really like being right. And not only being right, but being completely recognized and acknowledged by everyone in the land as the one who is right. This, um, quality, might be perfectly acceptable if, say, I lived on a deserted island. But as a person living among people—and with a person—it’s proved… problematic. And as a person being conformed to the image of … [Read more...]

It Takes Courage to Get Out of a Marriage Rut

It Takes Courage to Get Out of a Marriage Rut

Remember how the Israelites, God’s chosen people, wandered in the wilderness for 40 years before entering the Promised Land? They left Egypt, enabled, led and protected by the unmistakable hand of their miracle-working God, and embarked on a journey that should have lasted 11 days. Eleven days. Instead of crossing over into the land of promise after a … [Read more...]

How to “Be Present” This Holiday Season

How to "Be Present" This Holiday Season

I’ve been fighting a rising sense of panic this fall. Maybe that’s an overstatement. (Me? Never!) But whenever I glance ahead at the calendar and the looming *gulp* holidays, I feel overwhelmed…and tired…already. This is not normal for me. I am an extrovert with an addiction to holiday decorations. I love big, messy, loud family and friend gatherings from Thanksgiving … [Read more...]

Are You Cheating Your Spouse?

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I’ve been cheating on my husband. Wait, no. Let me start over. I’ve been cheating my husband. Last week, I was working on a lesson on hospitality for our Sunday School class. (Yes, that’s how we roll. We still have Sunday School. And I’m totally cool with that.) Anyway, in addition to the Scripture passages we were studying, I started looking up what a few other … [Read more...]

Marriage 101 :: Do You Need a Refresher?

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I don’t think Wal-Mart even waited until the Fourth of July stuff was cleared out. Row upon row of school supplies sprouted up, mid-summer it seems. Don’t get me wrong—I love school supplies. “I would send you a bouquet of newly sharpened pencils, if I knew your name and address…” (Name that movie!) And now it’s August, and “back-to-school” really is upon us. Some … [Read more...]

Expecting Tragedy Is No Way to Live

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Have you ever experienced exquisite joy—maybe while looking at your spouse and feeling overwhelmed with love for them, or watching your child sleeping in perfect, tousled peace; and in an instant—a split-second—you begin to imagine something terrible happening? The worst-case scenario plays out in fast-forward fashion, leaving you slightly terrified? I honestly thought I … [Read more...]

What You Can Look Forward to When the Kids Are Gone

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My husband and I hated the empty nest…for the first 15 minutes. Then we looked around at our quiet house and each other and thought: “Hmmm. Maybe…maybe this is going to be okay.” And you know what? It is. It has been. We spent 20 years raising two children to adulthood and then they did what they were supposed to do: they left home. And our lives shifted and buckled … [Read more...]

So Your Life Doesn’t Seem Pinterest-Worthy…

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I’m really glad Pinterest wasn’t around when I was a newlywed. Don’t get me wrong – I love Pinterest. I’m also a fan of Instagram, Twitter and Facebook. (And by “fan,” I mean I waste a ton of time am pretty active on social media.) But when I was a young newlywed, I’m not sure my fragile sense of self would have held up to the comparison culture created by the edited, … [Read more...]

When Your Marriage Is in a Funk

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Do you ever have times when you’re just plain out of sorts with your spouse? (If the answer is “no,” please move on. You’re just making the rest of us feel even worse.) I mean, nothing is seriously wrong (that you can put your finger on)—you’re just kind of in a funk and every little thing seems to be getting on your nerves? (This is where the guys exchange knowing … [Read more...]